Intelligence officer accused of passing secrets. Canadian military secrets? What, like the location of Tim Horton’s donuts shops in Halifax?
SKorea: Men arrested for smuggling gold in rectums. South Korea: Home of golden rectums. The jokes are just WAY too obvious to be of any use.
Cleared for Takeoff: Rhode Island Bakery Creates TSA ‘Compliant Cupcake’. Yeah, but it tastes like cardboard.
A solution for Toilet Phone Syndrome?. This might sound funny, but if you’ve ever dropped your phone into a toilet (or, like me, run them through a washing machine), you’ll understand.
Bacon Linked to Cancer (Again), Ruins Morning. Why is it that virtually everything REALLY good is REALLY bad for you?
AP expands North Korean coverage, opens first full news bureau by international agency. I would have thought Fox News Channel would have been the first to enable the distribution of North Korean anti-American propaganda.
Fox News Pundit On Pat Buchanan: MSNBC Almost A ‘Communist Channel’. Fox News Channel: Very Serious Conservative White People providing the analysis and reporting that knuckle-dragging Librul-haters expect.
Last surviving member of Spain’s Franco cabinet dies: This just in: Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead. Really.
Car collides with streetcar in South Lake Union. Another SLUT meets tragedy.
On MLK Day, Romney Campaigning With Anti-Immigrant Official Tied To Hate Groups. What, you were expecting Republicans to welcome African-Americans with open arms?
Self Esteem Is Making Your Children Weak and Dumb. Guess what? All that effort you’ve expended trying to help your children feel good about themselves? Yeah, well…it doesn’t work.
South Carolina Attorney General Perpetuates ‘Dead Voter’ Myth. Voter fraud: a problem only in the minds of Republicans looking for ways to bar likely Democratic voters from polling places. So much for democracy.
The Fragile Teenage Brain: An in-depth look at concussions in high school football. Hey, how many teenagers actually use their brains?
Chamber Of Commerce Drops Call For Health Care Repeal From Annual Policy Address. Because if God had meant for Americans to have access to health care insurance, they would have been born wealthy, White, and Conservative.
Staver Wants to See Diverse Viewpoints on College Campuses?. As long as that “diversity” means different strains of uber-Jesus-y Social Conservatism.
GOP Rep. Berates Student Concerned About Pell Grant Cuts, Tells Her To Join The Military. Because if God had meant for Americans to go to college, they would have been born wealthy, White, and Conservative.
