December 25, 2013 6:51 AM

A Christmas Tale: How Obama stole Christmas from God-fearing Conservative White children

The Liberal Clause takes place in the small town of Camas, WA where, for as long as anyone can remember, the children have been given the special responsibility of electing the Great Elf Council that serves at the North Pole. This year, however, the ballots go missing. Suspiciously, nasty ol’ Elf Peloosi discovers a box she claims are the missing ballots under a shelf in the back of a union warehouse. The elves are so glad the ballots have been recovered that they don’t bother to question the fact that there are more ballots returned than were cast!… The elves’ relief dissipates quickly as it becomes clear something fishy is going on. After the Liberal Party of Elves takes over the Great Council Santa Claus suddenly goes missing and the elf people are told he is being replaced.

Gather ‘round, children, ‘cuz Ima gonna tell you a story. It’s about how an evil Kenyan-born, Islamofascist, America-hating, illegal President and his evil minions stole Christmas from good, God-fearing, faithfully Conservative Children. Oh…and how one good, God-fearing Conservative White Patriot in Camas, WA, rescued Christmas from the clutches of Liberals who would crush the spirit of Christmas…..

I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. In a world where a not-even-thinly-veiled propaganda coloring book is dedicated to the “super hero” (no joke) that is Ted Cruz, we have a Tea Party-themed Christmas story.

Not that anyone’s trying to propagandize our precious, impressionable children or anything….

“[M]ein Liberal Claus,” who’s illustrated to look suspiciously like The Black Guy in the White House © usurps control of Christmas from those who understand the true meaning of the holiday (hijacking pagan traditions and grafting them onto celebration of the birth of Jesus).

Wow. Just…wow.

It seems the author has elected to portray himself a fine example of Right-wing decency and humanity. ‘Course, he did write the book, so if it salves his fragile ego to depict himself as the valiant Defender of All That’s Right and Moral ©…well, it’s still (nominally) a free country, right?

The Liberal Clause: Socialism on a Sleigh is written by David Hedrick, a Tea Party candidate who lost his bid this year to be the Republican candidate for Washington’s third district. You may remember him from this recent story where he is accused of physically assaulting his wife. I think I was the only person to buy a copy of The Liberal Clause last night because Hedrick came over personally to shake my hand, talking excitedly about what he’d created (the book costs $20 so I’m not surprised a lot of people passed). The story, he told me, came naturally one night as he was making up a bedtime story for his children (the book is dedicated to them with the warning “Never forget that free goodies from liberal elves often come at a price”). The satire where Obama steals Christmas that Hedrick came up with on that fateful night was too good not to be illustrated and published for all children to enjoy.

The Liberal Clause is (supposed to be) a rollicking good tale that tackles “too big to fail,” global climate change, the Liberal/Socialist agenda, out of control spending, financial dependency on China, and voter fraud. I may have missed a poorly camouflaged issue or six, but you get the idea, right? It also make the point that Fox News Channel (“Ox News” in the story) is “the only balanced and fair news station available,” and that there’s no free lunch (in this case, free candy).


I suppose if you’re going to brainwash children into believing your unsupportable propaganda and deception-heavy ideology, you’d best start early, right? And what better way to begin to convince children of the evils of godless Liberalism than to paint them as the sort of malevolent trolls who would steal Christmas from them? Because no good, God-fearing, White Christian Patriot would EVER take Christmas from children.

Must. Refrain. From. Pointing. Out. That. This. Version. Of. Christmas. Is. Wholly. Paganized.

I could spend a good deal of time, energy, and column inches ridiculing the author, David Hedrick, for producing propaganda of such poor quality that no self-respecting Soviet political commissar would have tolerated, but why bother? Hedrick’s story doesn’t need my help, because it satirizes itself. Anything else I could write about it would be piling on.

Sometimes, the STOOPID speaks for itself, no? And, at $20 (for a comic book, no less), it’s no wonder so many passed on such a fine propaganda literary undertaking….

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on December 25, 2013 6:51 AM.

Chester's nuts roasting on an open fire was the previous entry in this blog.

How the Mainstream Media would have covered the birth of Jesus is the next entry in this blog.

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