NBA legend Charles Barkley defended Adrian Peterson’s use of corporal punishment to discipline his child — a practice that led to the Minnesota Vikings running back’s indictment Friday on a charge of reckless or negligent child injury. Barkley said he believes Peterson’s actions were a byproduct of the manner in which he was raised. During a Sunday appearance on CBS’ “The NFL Today” pregame show, Barkley disagreed with Boomer Esiason, a former NFL player and CBS personality who harshly criticized Peterson over allegations that he used a switch to beat his 4-year-old son. “I’m from the south. I understand Boomer’s rage and anger. He’s a white guy and I’m a black guy,” Barkley said. “I don’t know where he’s from, I’m from the South. Whipping — we do that all the time. Every black parent in the south is going to be in jail under those circumstances.”
I befuddled by the argument that’s being put forward in support of Adrian Peterson. The idea that spanking is acceptable in the South because it’s a “cultural thing” is as absurd as it is immoral…and yet people in the South, particularly African-Americans, are arguing exactly that. It’s a “cultural thing”…and so therefore violence against children is acceptable? Beating children is a “loving gesture” designed to “instill discipline?” What kind of monsters thinks it appropriate to beat those unable to defend themselves from those who profess to love them?
How Charles Barkley came to be an expert on child rearing is something I can’t wrap my head around, just as the idea of black parents beating their children is as immoral as it is deeply offensive. For Barkley to justify violence against children- “whipping,” as he refers to it- and even advocate for it because it’s a “Southern thing” is nothing if not monstrous. You may be from the South, and you may have been “raised that way,” but that’s neither defense nor justification for using violence as a means of discipline.
No child deserves to be beaten. All that teaches a child is that might makes right, and that making mistakes means being beaten. If you want a child to live in fear, then by all means hit them…but if you see yourself as a loving, caring parent, violence CANNOT be viewed as a useful, viable parenting tool. Defining it as a “cultural thing,” or a “Southern thing,” is as cowardly and self-serving as it is immoral and wrong.
For his part, Adrian Peterson is saying “I caused an injury I never intended,” as if he’s trying to pass it off as a boo-boo. “Oops; my bad….” He clearly doesn’t understand the impact that beating a child can have, and arguing that he was “raised that way” is a pretty damned week defense. Peterson’s bland, legally-sanitized statement indicates that he’s sorry he hurt his son, but not so much for hitting his son.
In the meantime, news has come to light that Peterson’s hit another son, this one all of four years old, and left marks. If this is true, the man shouldn’t be carrying a football; he should be wearing an orange prison jumpsuit.
I have to live with the fact that when I disciplined my son the way I was disciplined as a child, I caused an injury that I never intended or thought would happen. I know that many people disagree with the way I disciplined my child. I also understand after meeting with a psychologist that there are other alternative ways of disciplining a child that may be more appropriate.
I have learned a lot and have had to reevaluate how I discipline my son going forward. But deep in my heart I have always believed I could have been one of those kids that was lost in the streets without the discipline instilled in me by my parents and other relatives. I have always believed that the way my parents disciplined me has a great deal to do with the success I have enjoyed as a man. I love my son and I will continue to become a better parent and learn from any mistakes I ever make.
I’ll freely admit to being nothing close to a neutral observer when it comes to the issue of violence against children. My own childhood experience left me bitter, angry, and I only recently began to admit and come to grips with what was done to me- and to call it what it was: child abuse. What Adrian Peterson did to his son was child abuse. It shouldn’t be reduced to him saying, “Oops…my bad!” and being given a free pass. Beating and abusing a child should come with substantial consequences. Peterson shouldn’t be given a slap on the wrist simply because he’s a star football player and his team wants him back (and- full disclosure- I’m a Vikings fan).
If you hit a child, if you believe that being a parent gives you the right to use violence as a means of enforcing discipline, you have no business being a parent. If you believe that it’s OK to hit a child because “it’s a cultural thing,” or “I was raised that way,” or “It’s a Southern thing,” there should be a reserved parking space waiting for you in Hell. Your children should be removed from your home and placed with adults who will treat them kindly but firmly when necessary.
If your parents hit you as a child then it’s OK to hit your children. (Also works for absenteeism and neglect!)
- God (@TheTweetOfGod)
There’s never a good time or reason to hit a child. Believing that “spanking” is a legitimate parenting tool makes you a monster. If the only way you can effectively discipline a child is by hitting them, you don’t deserve to be a parent. Period. And if you’re going to argue that I’m being too emotional, I’d challenge you to walk a mile in my shoes. I’d submit that you might not be so sure of yourself.
Violence is not the answer. Violence is NEVER the answer. It’s not a “cultural thing” or a “Southern thing.” Hitting a child isn’t OK because you were “raised that way.” If you did it to an adult, you’d likely find yourself arrested and jailed…so why is doing it to a child considered acceptable?
If you want to hit someone, how about picking on someone your own size, someone who can actually fight back and defend themselves? Or are you such a coward that you’d only hit a child who can’t respond in kind?
It’s not about race; it’s about doing the right thing and protecting children. No child deserves to be beaten, regardless of whatever justification one might put forth. Our children deserve better from us.
