Todd Starnes, Fox News Radio host and one of the world’s greatest defenders of Conservative Tax-cutting Gun-toting Jesus, celebrated the birth of our lord (Jesus, not Ronald Reagan) with a singing and dancing and totally not gay at all spectacular All-American Christmas Special…. After the big opening number, Todd Starnes himself comes on stage to talk about Jesus…but first, a little reminder that you’re probably getting coal and going to hell if you watch MSNBC, like it says in the Bible…. “If you listen to one of those other stations,” he says, “you’re probably on Santa’s naughty list.” Then he talks about pork butt. He really loves pork butt, but — and swear to Christ, we are not making this up, this is an actual direct-from-his-derphole quote — “We can all agree that Chick-fil-A is the official chicken of Jesus, Amen.”
Sometimes, it can be exceedingly difficult to ridicule someone so thoroughly ridiculous that every fiber of their being is an exercise in self-parody. Todd Starnes is a perfect example of this, a Right-wing, gay-hating, ‘Merica-loving, Red Meat Christian so thoroughly convinced of his own righteousness that he just KNOWS y’all are going straight to Hell.
Never mind that his not-at-ALL gay-themed Christmas special was a sight to behold. Starnes clearly sees no irony nor ANYTHING inappropriate about using a news organization’s Christmas special to proselytize for Conservative Jesus…and he’s here make it clear that he’s going to kick ass and take names…in Conservative Jesus’ name, of course!
There’s a word of warning I need to issue for all of the politically correct folks out there, and you know who you are. These grinches who get their stockings in a bunch at the sight of a nativity. Well, I don’t mean to curdle your eggnog, but I’m about as politically incorrect as as they come, folks. I believe that Jesus is the reason for the season. And during our Fox News Radio Christmas Special, we’re going to conduct ourselves accordingly and celebrate the birth of our lord.
Jesus may be the reason for the season- to Todd Starnes. Evidently, being “politically incorrect” means treating any and all other belief systems that don’t mesh with his own as insignificant, errant, and wholly unworthy of respect.
And things really got weird. Former Alaska half-Governor Sarah Palin phoned it in to Starnes’ magnus opus, and in true Caribou Barbie grifter fashion, she opines that America would be a better place if we just put the “Christ” back into “Christmas”…oh, and while you’re at it, be sure to buy a copy of her book, ‘kay??
And don’t get me started on why a news organization that calls itself “fair and balanced” is holding the equivalent of a tent revival….
