This fall, many election campaigns are revolving around the need to improve our schools and the quality of our children's education. Here in Texas, the mantra is repeated ad nauseum. Well, at least one elected official is doing something besides granting photo opportunities and spewing sound bites in an effort to improve test scores. Florida Governor Jeb Bush is actually doing something to increase test scores in his state- he's importing Japanese students.
"Japanese schoolchildren are considered by many to be the best students in the world," said the Governor.
"They don't require one-on-one attention so we can load up on class size, they don't complain about crumbling schools or other poor conditions, and they could probably defend themselves against a disaffected juvenile armed with a submachine gun who's shooting holes in their classmates with some kind of karate or kung-fu or something," added Bush.
Bush campaign officials confirmed that the students would be abducted during international class trips to Walt Disney World in Orlando. Initial plans call for the children to be diverted to school buses after waiting in line at the Space Mountain roller coaster for more than three hours.
"We don't expect that they'll complain too much about the scenario," said the Governor. "They should be able to just breeze through our most advanced classes without missing a beat, and we think they already speak American just fine."
Let it never be said that Jeb isn't a man of action....
