To whom it may concern:
Let it be known far and wide that today commences the first and only TPRS boycott of Best Buy. I am sick and tired of the surly, indifferent service, the cattle-car checkout lines, the pushy, disinterested sales staff, and management that doesn't follow through on their promises. F*****g morons, all of them.
Today, I went over to our local Best Buy (hereafter known as Tech Hell) to get a case for my new PDA. To be honest, the only reason I went to Tech Hell was that Susan gave me a $20 gift certificate. Frankly, I would have been better off letting her keep the gift cardand taking $20 out of my wallet somewhere else.
When I got to the display case, I was confronted by several different cases, all hermetically sealed. Of course, I wanted to be able to be certain that whatever case I was interested in would fit my PDA. Naively, I asked a sales rep if I could open the package to verify that the case would first.
Sales Drone: "Sorry, (without so much as anything resembling eye contact) we can't do that."
Me: "You mean I can't even check to see if this case will fit?"
Sales Drone: "The only way you can do that is to buy it, and return it if it doesn't work."
Me: "That's ridiculous. How am I suppose to have any idea if this is even what I'm looking for."
Sales Drone: "I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do."
Clearly, I was going to get nowhere with the amazingly lifelike Ms. Sales Drone. Under normal circumstances, I would have turned on my heels and walked out of the store then and there, never to return. Unfortunately, I had the $20 gift card, and I felt honor-bound to use it.
I finally picked a case I hoped would work. Great; now I can pay and get the hell out of this sick excuse for a store. WRONG!!! I reached the checkout counter only to have to wait in a 20-person line. It had all the ambiance of a cattle car. I would have begun mooing, but I think the humor would have been lost on the Drones. After a few minutes, I wasn't sure if I was being funnelled to the checkout counter or to slaughter.
Finally, a surly, smile-free Checkout Drone motioned me toward the register. She checked me out, put my purchase in a bag, and finally, I was freed of my shackles. I left hurriedly, swearing never to go back. I fully intend to keep my promise.
This is not my first run-in with Tech Hell. Two months ago, we bought a 51" TV, and paid to have it delivered. The night before, when we called to confirm delivery, we were told by a Delivery Drone that it would not be happening as promised. What made it even worse was that the Customer Service Drone that Susan spoke to called her a liar.
I made a beeline for the store the next day, thirsty for blood and looking for scalps. No one calls my wife- one of the most honest people you could ever hope to meet- a liar. I was promised by a mid-level Management Drone that the Store Manager Drone would be in touch the next day. Not surprisingly, I am still waiting to hear from the f*****g moron.
So, yes, this is the first day of my own personal vendetta against Best Buy...er, Tech Hell. Never again will I darken the doorstep of Tech Hell- not for any reason, nor for any amount of money. I have no desire to revisit the Dark Side, and the Drones unfortunate enough to work there can kiss my @##. Being that this is not a democracy, I am in no mood to brook dissenting opinions. If you actually like Tech Hell and enjoy shopping there, proceed at your own peril. I truly, truly pity you.
